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He wrote a prescription, which he said he would leave at the nearest chemist s, and he impressed upon her the necessity of taking her medicine with the utmost regularity. Getting up to go, he held out his hand. Don t be downhearted, you ll soon get over your throat. But as he went her face became suddenly distorted, and she caught hold of his coat. Oh, don t leave me, she cried hoarsely. I m so afraid, don t leave me alone yet. Phil, please. There s no one else I can go to, you re the only friend I ve ever had. He felt the terror of her soul, and it was strangely like that terror he had seen in his uncle s eyes when he feared that he might die. Philip looked down. Twice that woman had come into his life and made him wretched she had no claim upon him and yet, he knew not why, deep in his heart was a strange aching it was that which, when he received her letter, had left him no peace till he obeyed her summons. I suppose I shall never really quite get over it, he said to himself. What perplexed him was that he felt a curious physical distaste, which made it uncomfortable for him to be near her. What do you want me to do he asked. Let s go out and dine together. I ll pay. He hesitated. He felt that she was creeping back again into his life when he thought she was gone out of it for ever. She watched him with sickening anxiety. Oh, I know I ve treated you shocking, but don t leave me alone now. You ve had your revenge. If you leave me by myself now I don t know what I shall do. All right, I don t mind, he said, but we shall have to do it on the cheap, I haven t got money to throw away these days. She sat down and put her shoes on, then changed her skirt and put on a hat and they walked out together till they found a restaurant in the Tottenham Court Road. Philip had got out of the habit of eating at those hours, and Mildred s throat was so sore that she could not swallow. They had a little cold ham and Philip drank a glass of beer. They sat opposite one premier league leaked kits 19/20 another, as they had so often sat before he wondered if she remembered they had nothing to say to one another and would have sat in silence if Philip had not forced himself to talk. In the bright light of the restauran.
e up his mind to set out as soon as he got a reply. Mrs. Carey turned the matter over in her mind incessantly she felt that Philip included her in the hatred he bore her husband, and the thought tortured her. She loved him with all her heart. At length she spoke to him she listened attentively while he poured out all his disillusionment of London and his eager ambition for the future. I may be no good, but at least let me have a premier league leaked kits 19/20 try. I can t be a worse failure than I was in that beastly office. And I feel that I can paint. I know I ve got it in me. premier league leaked kits 19/20 She was not so sure as her husband that they did right in thwarting so strong an inclination. She had read of great painters whose parents had opposed their wish to study, the event had shown with what folly and after all it was just as possible for a painter to lead a virtuous life to the glory of God as for a chartered accountant. I m so afraid of your going to Paris, she said piteously. It wouldn t be so bad if you studied in London. If I m going in for painting I must do it thoroughly, and it s only in Paris that you can get the real thing. At his suggestion Mrs. Carey wrote to the solicitor, saying that Philip was discontented with his work in London, and asking what he thought of a change. Mr. Nixon answered as follows Dear Mrs. Carey, I have seen Mr. Herbert Carter, and I am afraid I must tell you that Philip has not done so well as one could have wished. If he is very strongly set against the work, perhaps it is better that he should take the opportunity there is now to break his articles. I am naturally very disappointed, but as you know you can take a horse to the water, but you can t make him drink. Yours very sincerely, Albert Nixon. The letter was shown to the Vicar, but served only to increase his obstinacy. He was willing enough that Philip should take up some other profession, he suggested his father s calling, medicine, but nothing would induce him to pay an allowance if Philip went to Paris. It s a mere excuse for self indulgence and sensuality, he said. I m interested to hear you blame self indulgence in others, retorted Philip acidly. But by this time an answer had come from Hayward, giving the name of a hotel where Philip could get a room for thirty francs a month and enclosing a note of introduction to the massiere of a school. Philip read the letter to Mrs. Carey and told her he proposed to start on the first of September. But you haven t got any.ibly painful, and his heart was torn. Without realising what he did, he went up to her and put his arms round her she did not resist, but in her wretchedness surrendered herself to his comforting. He whispered to her little words of solace. He scarcely knew what he was saying, he bent over her and kissed her repeatedly. Are you awfully unhappy he said at last. I wish I was dead, she moaned. I wish I d died when the baby come. Her hat was in her way, and Philip took portugal soccer sweatshirt it off for her. He placed her head more retro argentina football shirt comfortably in the chair, and then he went and sat down at the table and looked premier league leaked kits 19/20 at her. It is awful, love, isn t it he said. Fancy anyone wanting to be in love. Presently the violence of her sobbing diminished and she sat in the chair, exhausted, with her head thrown back and her arms hanging by her side. She had the grotesque look of one of those painters dummies used to hang draperies on. I didn t know you loved him so much as all that, said Philip. He understood Griffiths love well enough, for he put himself in Griffiths place and saw with his eyes, touched with chelsea tee shirts his hands he was able to think himself in Griffiths body, and he kissed her with his lips, smiled at her with his smiling blue eyes. It was her emotion that surprised him. He had never thought her capable of passion, and this was passion there was no mistaking it. Something seemed to give way in his heart it really felt to him as though something were breaking, and he felt strangely weak. I don t want to make you unhappy. You needn t come away with me if you don t want to. I ll give you the money all the same. She shook her head. No, I said I d come, and I ll come. What s the good, if you re sick with love for him Yes, that s the word. I m sick with love. I know it won t last, just as well as he does, but just now She paused and shut her eyes as though she were going to faint. A strange idea came to Philip, and he spoke it as it came, without stopping to think it out. Why don t you go away with him How can I premier league leaked kits 19/20 You know we haven t got the money. I ll give you the money You She sat up and looked at him. Her eyes began to shine, and the colour came into her cheeks. Perhaps the best thing would be to get it over, and then you d come back to me. Now that he had made the suggestion he was sick with anguish, and yet the torture of it gave him a strange, subtle sensation. She stared at him with open eyes. Oh, how could we, on your money Harry wouldn t think of.ed she asked. Not yet, I m not a bit sleepy. premier league leaked kits 19/20 Lawson was in great form. He talked sixteen to the dozen from the moment I got there t shirt real madrid till the moment I left. What did you talk about Heaven knows Of every subject under the sun. You should have seen us all shouting at the tops of our voices and nobody listening. Philip laughed with pleasure at the recollection, and Mildred laughed too. She was pretty sure he had drunk more than was good for him. That was exactly what she had expected. She knew men. Can I sit down she said. Before he could answer she settled herself on his knees. If you re not going to bed you d better go and put on a dressing gown. Oh, I m all right as I am. Then putting her arms round his neck, she placed her face against his and said Why are you so horrid to me, Phil He tried to get up, but she would not let him. I do love you, Philip, she said. Don t talk damned rot. It isn t, it s true. I man utd all kits can t live without you. I want you. He released himself from her arms. Please get up. You re making a fool of yourself and you re making me feel a perfect idiot. I love you, Philip. I want to make up for all the harm I did you. I can t go on like this, it s not in human nature. He slipped out of the chair and left her in it. I m very sorry, but it s too late. She gave a heart rending sob. But why How can you be so cruel I suppose it s because I loved you too much. I wore the passion out. The thought of anything of that sort horrifies me. I can t look at you now without thinking of Emil and Griffiths. One can t help those things, I suppose it s just nerves. She seized his hand and covered it with kisses. Don t, he cried. She sank back into the chair. I can t go on like this. If you won t love me, premier league leaked kits 19/20 I d rather go away. Don t be foolish, you haven t anywhere to go. You can stay here as long as you like, but it must be on the definite understanding that we re friends and nothing more. Then she dropped suddenly the vehemence of passion and gave premier league leaked kits 19/20 a soft, chelsea home kits insinuating laugh. She sidled up to Philip and put her arms round him. She made her voice low and w. heedling. Don t be such an old silly. I believe you re nervous. You don t know how nice I can be. She put her face against his and rubbed his cheek with hers. To Philip her smile was an abominable leer, and the suggestive glitter of her eyes filled him with horror. He drew back instinctively. I won t, he said. But she would not let him go. She sought his mouth with her lips. He took her hands and tore th.
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